Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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