My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize