So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
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