Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize