I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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