Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'm having to shit out rocks
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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