omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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