Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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