His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize