ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize