Sry I called you an 8
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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