escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize