I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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