Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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