Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize