FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
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