I wish I only lived at night.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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