it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
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I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
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Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
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