Porn is love you can see.
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
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Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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