You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize