I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
We got so high we made milksteak
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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