If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
dude. I can hear the air.
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