well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize