CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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