HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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