Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
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Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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