I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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