How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize