I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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