just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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