When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
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I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
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How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize