so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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