i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
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Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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