Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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