He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
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It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
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Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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