allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You have to summon your inner elephant
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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