i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
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