I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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