we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
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