I can text with my tongue
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Randomize