I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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