she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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