i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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