Too much gin, very little bucket
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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