Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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