I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We talked him into tasing himself.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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