My friends, they love my intelligence
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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