my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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