My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize