The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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